Should the Flag Lapel Pin Panic Grip America?
Worcester, Mass., May 2: Libertarian Presidential candidate George
Phillies today spoke out on the national flag lapel pin crisis. "Most
Americans never noticed there was a flag lapel pin crisis, not after
thousands of our men and women died in Iraq and the budget deficit
headed for $500 billion a year. Fortunately, moderators at a recent
Democratic Presidential debate cleared things up, at least for people
worried about jobs, plummeting real estate prices, soaring gasoline
prices, and skyrocketing food and medical costs, not to mention the
sad state of education. Most of us would never have guessed that the
flag lapel pin crisis is more important.
"I respect our flag," Phillies said. "That means I don't use it as
costume jewelry. In fact, I almost never wear lapel pins. Why? By
geographic adoption, I'm a Yankee. We Yankees know thrift is a
virtue. Every time you stick a pin through your suit, you damage the
fabric. That's pointless waste.
"More seriously," Phillies continued, "I'm campaigning on issues real
Americans actually care about. The War. Civil liberties. Ending fiscal
lunacy in Washington. Education, energy, and the environment. Medical
care costs. The economy. And I'm giving Americans sensible
libertarian answers, answers that my fellow Americans will support.
Those answers will give us a better America."
http://www.doctor-dark.co.uk
2008-05-04 @ 00:18